Magic and miracles


From the bottom of my heart, and the top of my head, and the deepest reaches of my soul…

Thank you

Thank you so much for the good thoughts and prayers from yesterday.  I think they worked magic and miracles.  No matter what happens today, your comments and support helped set my mind at ease, my panicked self was calmed.

I woke up at 8:15 a.m. checked the *ahem* and no more pink.  I only got a little bit after a couple of checks last night after The Freakout that turned from a hint of pink to a hint of brown.  Maybe the prometrium tablet irritated my insides?  I was just heading off to the set and found the pink and I lost it.  It was just a little too perfect for the timing, y’know?  Yesterday was the first day AF was due to arrive and I am NEVER late.  I was getting those strange crampy symptoms right before the bitch comes for her visit.  All the tenderness in my breasts had suddenly disappeared.  It was all too much a coincidence, hence the freakout. I knew it wasn’t implantation bleeding since that can happen roughly 2-5 days after transfer.  Friday was 9dp5dt.

I had my awesome assistant Mike take over production/location management yesterday (he knows what is going on with me and gave me a big hug and told me to go home and take care of myself).  It was a very good idea because the gaffer and grip team showed up 2 hours late (just as I was leaving).  I had gotten into a minor argument with the Director of Photography and the 1st AD the day before about their scheduling.

Me: Why is the lighting team scheduled on the call sheets at the same time as everyone else?  They are often late and take the longest to set up.  I understand that they are pros and set up in a very reasonable amount of time given the complexity of what they do, but dangit.  Many times we are waiting on them and don’t start shooting ‘til 3-4 hours after call time.  Why aren’t they scheduled an hour earlier?  The actors who are getting here on time are pissed (justifiably so).

Their answer:  No they aren’t late and never hold up production.  You don’t know what you’re talking about.

Me in my brain yesterday: (2.5 hours after call time while the grip team is barely unloading) HA!  Suck it gentlemen!  Enjoy your late night, a-holes. I’m audi 5000.

I dropped off some legal paperwork, got a little footage for the behind the scenes the documentary, and was on my way. 

I came home and relaxed with MrBeep who calmed me and reassured me and made me feel a ton better.  He told me “don’t give up” and “stay positive for the monsters” and “you don’t know just yet” combined with his smile and his eyes and my heart was soothed.  How do they do that?  Love is so many things and I am lucky to know it…and MrBeep.

Today is a very very rainy day (even for Seattle).  I hydroplaned drove to the RE’s office this morning and gave my blood.  In that tiny vial it is my Answer.  Our Answer. 

12 comments on "Magic and miracles"

Kate on October 17, 2009 at 11:11 AM said...

My fingers remain crossed for you. When do you get results?

**hugs**

Mrs. Gamgee on October 17, 2009 at 11:37 AM said...

I am keeping everything crossed and sending many many prayers for good news for you & MrBeep.

And thank you so much for your kind words (and a great LotR reference, too!) They mean so much!

Sunny on October 17, 2009 at 11:38 AM said...

I have been thinking about you all morning!!!! I'm so glad the pink is gone. Praying praying praying and not so patiently waiting for your next post...

Mad Hatter on October 17, 2009 at 11:39 AM said...

Hoping for the best possible answer!
Love,
Maddy

one-hit_wonder on October 17, 2009 at 11:51 AM said...

waiting impatiently until the next post! xxx

mekate on October 17, 2009 at 12:37 PM said...

hoping praying (yes I am! crazy! I know!)
HOPING hoping
wishing for miracles and all good things. SOrry I missed sending love with your pink/brown panic and hope you never have that again. If you are on progesterone suppositories, that could do a lot of irritating.

thinking of you NON STOP
holding hope for magical monsters. I do believe in them.
xox
Kate

Kate on October 17, 2009 at 1:02 PM said...

Hope you get a happy call today!

Photogrl on October 17, 2009 at 1:35 PM said...

Hoping, wishing and praying for you and MrBeep!

Clare on October 17, 2009 at 1:51 PM said...

Oh my oh my... I am on the edge of my seat! I really hope you get fantastic news... i hope we both do in the next few days! Fingers and toes crossed! xx

K on October 17, 2009 at 2:04 PM said...

Sitting on pins and needles. Please tell us soon....

Liv on October 17, 2009 at 3:34 PM said...

Marvy and I are praying for you my dear. Been thinking about you all week. Hoping, hoping, hoping for good news from those little monsters!

meinsideout on October 17, 2009 at 3:35 PM said...

please, please, please - hoping so hard for you.

 

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